Once you are engaged, there are so many things to think about! And inviting people to your wedding is one of those. Once you have sorted all the initial bookings and chosen your date, then you need to let people know so they don’t go and double book with this biggest event of the year – and after all, you probably want to make the announcement that you are getting married!
When it comes to when to send save the dates and wedding invitations, both can come down to how far your guests are travelling. At Blackstock Country Estate, where guests often travel in from Brighton, Eastbourne, Tunbridge Wells and further afield, that usually means giving people more notice than a typical local wedding. Here’s what to send when, and how to set an RSVP deadline that works.
Send your save the date as soon as your date and venue are confirmed, if you’re using one at all. There’s no need to wait for a set countdown window; the earlier your guests know, the more time they have to book time off, arrange childcare or even start thinking about travel.
If a good number of your guests are coming from outside the local area, which is common for weddings at Blackstock Estate given our location between Brighton, Eastbourne and Tunbridge Wells, getting the save the date out early matters even more. The same applies if your wedding falls near a bank holiday, half term or another popular travel period, when accommodation and transport get booked up faster.
Save the dates don’t need every detail. The date, the location and a line saying formal invitations will follow is enough. You can confirm the finer points, dress code, timings, accommodation options, once the invitations go out.
Image above by Luke Woodford Photography
Working out when to send save the dates and wedding invitations doesn’t need to be complicated. Traditional wedding etiquette says invitations should go out six to eight weeks before the day, though most couples do send them earlier, particularly when travel is involved.
It mostly comes down to how much notice your guests need, especially if they’ve got any distance to cover. For a mostly local guest list, two to three months before the day can work well. If guests are coming from further afield, or you want them to book accommodation alongside the invite, it’s worth extending that to four to six months, and up to six to eight months for a true destination wedding.
Image above by Just About Weddings
RSVP just means guests confirming whether they can attend. Once your save the dates and wedding invitations are sent, the last step is your RSVP deadline. Rather than fixing this to a set number of weeks before the day, build in enough time to invite reserve guests if anyone on your list can’t make it. Many couples keep a short reserve list to invite once the first round of RSVPs comes back, so leaving that window open gives you room to fill any gaps before final numbers are due with your venue and caterer.
Invitation timing has a knock-on effect here too. Send invitations too late, and there’s no time left to invite reserves if guests drop out, which makes catering numbers, seating and any final payments harder to sort in good time.
Image above by Luke Woodford Photography
Blackstock Country Estate is set in Hellingly, East Sussex, so a good number of guests at weddings here are travelling in rather than living down the road. If that sounds like your guest list too, it’s worth building extra time into your invitations for people to sort travel and, where needed, somewhere to stay overnight. It’s part of why invitations here often go out earlier than average, given how many guests have some distance to cover.
We offer full-day, exclusive-use weddings, where the venue is yours for the whole day rather than shared with another wedding. Couples planning this kind of day tend to book well ahead, and sending invitations in good time fits the same pattern. On-site accommodation is available for guests who want to stay close by, so it’s worth mentioning this when the invitations go out if you already know some of your guest list will need it.
Working out your rough guest list before save the dates go out also helps if you’re getting close to capacity. Blackstock Estate can host up to 120 guests, so knowing broadly who’s coming, even before every RSVP is back, makes it easier to plan the day around your numbers.
Image above by Anthony Hazelden
Working out when to send save the dates and wedding invitations, then setting your RSVP deadline, is what makes the months before your wedding at Blackstock Estate feel less stressful. If you’re planning your wedding here and want to talk through your own timeline alongside choosing a date, take a look at what’s included in venue hire at Blackstock Estate, or visit our weddings page for more on the day itself. Whenever you’re ready to talk it through, call the Blackstock Estate team on 01323 848006 to check availability and arrange a date, or book a private viewing.
Image above by Charlotte Amy Photography